Ludwig’s Center Stage Café

OK, so, a philosophical debate: so far we at The Xonuts Blog have tried to be nothing but positive to the numerous restaurants at which we breakfast. This morning though, a few minutes after our arrival, Bo whispered to Dave, “So, do we really write a bad review of this place?” Dave’s eventual response: “We have a civic duty.” A duty to be honest. A duty to maintain our credibility. A duty to recommend to you, our loyal reader (I mean, our loyal four readers), that, maybe . . . just . . . maybe think twice about going to Ludwig’s for breakfast? There, I said it.

The restaurant opens at “7 a.m.” However, Bo and Dave had been here before, and remember waiting outside for a few minutes for the morning employee to arrive. Sure enough, while Bo and Dave were en route this morning, Pat sends out a text, “It doesn’t look like they are opening anytime soon.” Bo responded that Ludwig’s opened late last time, which was part of the reason why xonuts was scheduled for 7:15 a.m. today, not the usual 7.

Bo and Pat then waited outside the place, enjoying the crisp Gibbs Street air, until around 7:15, when the morning employee (the same one as last time) arrived, opened the door, and busied herself turning off the alarm system, etc., etc. Coffee took a while to make, so we placed our orders at the counter (Dave arrived shortly thereafter and placed his order). Pat considered getting a banana or something because he knew that the food would take a while to make. Pat, a former food service professional, noted the lack of table wipe down that appeared endemic.

Bo ordered the French toast and a muffin (cut in half and grilled, a.k.a. “Fostered”), Dave ordered the breakfast burrito, and Pat ordered the “Orchestra,” i.e., french toast, eggs (over “medium”), and sausage. We each got coffee, as well. The cost for all three of us was a little over $20.

Plus side: real, homey-looking coffee mugs! Dave marveled at his mug, which contained the Monroe Community College emblem. Our food was soon ready, more quickly than we had dreaded. Unfortunately, Ludwig’s, like many places, does not have real maple syrup, although it took a little while to discover this, as the employee did not seem to understand our question of whether the syrup was “real” or not. Sure it’s pancake syrup. No, no, no, like, real? And no, we were not asking whether we were in Plato’s cave or whether we were brains-in-a-vat (or the Matrix, for the less-educated readers out there). Luckily, Bo brought just enough real maple syrup for his (not Pat’s) French toast.

Imaginary maple syrup
Syrup that has existed, exists, or will exist

The French toast seemed fine, although Pat believed that his was a little overcooked. His chief complaint, though, was that his eggs were not over medium. And they definitely were not, even though I think we can all agree that “over medium” is something that a dilettante would order. Pat’s eggs were runny (i.e., over easy, or “over light” if you’re a sociopath).

French toast and a neat-o coffee mug
The overture. Or the orchestra. I don’t remember. Hang on… Overture.
An anatomical cross-section of the breakfast burrito. Dave waxed intellectual about the true distinction between a “wrap” and a “burrito”

There are two kinds of people in this world – those who think burritos should be bursting at the seams with ingredients and burrito goodness, and those who are wrong. Society expects burritos that taste less like a bready product and more like eggs, breakfast meat, potatoes, unicorns. Society would be underwhelmed with a burrito from Ludwig’s Center Stage. Though the shell was expertly grilled, the innards were bereft of substantial ingredients leading to a disproportionately tortilla flavor.

Oh yeah and Bo’s muffin came out a bit late. Poor, forgotten muffin.

Half of a lemon poppy-seed muffin. It was fine!

To his horror, Bo found a hair in his French toast. I mean, we’re pretty sure it was a hair. Like there’s not much else it could have been, and it sort of matched the employee’s hair. So, it was definitely/probably a hair.

One (1) hair

We were thanked for our patience. You’re welcome.

With 10 as a must-eat, this dining experience rates a well, I mean, maybe consider going for lunch? They have pretty good turkey melts, and if you call ahead they’ll have it ready so you don’t have to wait. I can’t really say more because this is a breakfast blog, and to write about a turkey melt would require some sort of, I don’t even know, lunch blog or something, which is a concept so ridiculous it makes me want to laugh out loud and chortle… but aaahh, but not at you, O most wonderful of readers with the wrathfulness and the vengeance and the bloodrain and the “hey hey hey it hurts me.”


Pro Tip: If you’re coming for breakfast, come a little later!

Don’t Miss: Java’s coffee, across the street, has some pretty good coffee!

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